I Am the Israeli

59

I am the focus of Palestinian fury
I caused the Palestinian Diaspora and the exile
I refuse to provide Palestinian travel documents
And I deny the owners of the land I stole,
Rightful possession of an ID card.
I imprison Palestinians without trial
I beat and torture them
I fear their anger, but envy their freedom
For I am a slave of my passions.
Though I am their jailer
They enjoy more liberty than me,
For their minds are free
From the oppression I inflict on their bodies.
I am the one who detains Palestinians
Without their consent, in the absence
Of a trial by law.
I am the Israeli soldier
Shooting live bullets
Into the hearts of my enemies.
Though I kill their children
Demolish their houses,
And deport them,
I envy their valiance, their spirit,
Their resilience against my brutality.
I perpetrated the massacres at Deir Yassin,
Sabra and Shatella,
Tel el-Za’ter
Al-Aqsa and El-Haram El-Ibrahami,
Yet, they rise out of their own ashes
Like the Phoenix bird and carry forward
Their banners of courage
Through their blood-stained streets.
I am the Zionist officer
Slapping young Palestinian men across their faces
I humiliate them at every crossroad,
Every bypass, and every checkpoint
But no matter how hard I try,
I cannot take their identity away from them,
Yet my own identity
Slowly slips away into oblivion.
The incessant memory returning,
The Palestinian of 48
The Palestinian of 67
The Palestinian of 98
And the latest model of 2001,
Haunt me.
I am the Occupier
And the haunting insomnia is mine alone.
I am the reason for the Intifada.
My armor bears the brunt of five hundred thousand
Rocks hurled at me
I quickly retaliate by shooting to kill
The Gentile children,
The infant Palestinian Davids.
I hear the Palestinian Dabkeh
The wedding bells of newlyweds
And I envy my enemies their
Moments of silent dignified joy.
I am the cause of the endless funeral processions
Of the Lion’s sons, Palestinian Shibels.
I am Pontius Pilate and Herod in one,
Palestinian blood drips from my hands
Its indelible red remains stamped
Upon my memory forever.
I am Judas and every day is The Last Supper
For those I lead to the slaughter.
I am the Israeli fearing God’s wrath
And the reincarnation of Sodom and Gomorrah.
I am the new Hitler
Out to slay the innocent
All the while, losing my own humanity.
I dwell in a state of perpetual denial of my own hideous crimes
And refuse to recognize my savagery, my own brutality.
I am the Israeli settler dancing around
The dying young Palestinian I dragged
Through the streets,
I passed out candy
And mutilated his body
Even before his heart stopped beating,
But I sold my soul to the devil in the process.
I am the cause of the Palestinian Holocaust.
I have rewritten history so many times, I no longer know the truth,
And I have hung so many heroes that I have lost count.
And though I feign superiority
Over all non-Jews,
I am not proud of what I am
Or what I’ve done.
I am the Israeli.